Sunday, 19 April 2015
I thought about not writing this post but then I thought WHY THE HELL NOT?! We all get periods (apart from you boys, soz) so I wanted to write about all the period-y thoughts that bless my brain when it's 'that time of the month' (I hate that phrase) in the hope that you'll be able to relate to.
1. You know your period is approaching when you literally feel like you're about to karate kick your boyfriend for interrupting you whilst you're writing a tweet.
2. THE NEED FOR CHOCOLATE HAS NEVER BEEN SO REAL. Literally, give me all the Cadburys in the world and I will eat it. Along with 3 packets of skips, a sandwich, a whole tub of Ben & Jerry's & the rest of that pizza from last night.
3. That moment when you strut up to the Cashier at Tesco with your monthly supplies feeling all confident but then when you realise it's a boy and you've got to make eye contact you get all embarrassed.
4. You suddenly start sobbing uncontrollably because you can't find your new lipstick. Then you realise your mascara's all smudged and it makes you cry even more.
5. "THIS IS THE WORST PERIOD I'VE EVER HAD!" you scream when your boyfriend kindly reminds you that you also said that about your last 73 periods.
6. That 'am I /aren't I' moment when you're too scared to get up in case there's blood on your seat.
7. You suddenly find yourself giving serious evils to every man you see. YEP THAT'S RIGHT, YOU JUST GET ON WITH YOUR DAY, RANDOM MAN, YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT REAL PAIN FEELS LIKE!
8. Hot water bottles become your BFF and they never leave your side.
9. That feeling when you sneeze and you're genuinely concerned your womb is about to fly out of your vagina.
10 . Your boyfriend goes to touch your boob and you're fully prepared to scream the entire house down. DON'T YOU KNOW THEY'RE SENSITIVE?! GOD!
11. But no matter how much you complain, you're secretly chuffed you've got your period as you're totally freaked that you're contraception will fail you one day.
* Disclaimer - there's totally nothing to be embarrassed about buying tampons, I'm just the most awks person in the world. *